Home Ownership and Your (Lack of) Sanity

It's been pretty much beaten into me that home ownership is the pinnacle of your adult career. When you've purchased your first house, you've essentially "made it". I guess this all ties into the American dream: 2.5 kids (who has a half a kid?), a dog, white picket fence, and a little piece of land to call your own. But don't you think this has changed a little especially with the current state of the economy? Hasn't the American dream been modified to mean a roof over your head, a job that won't let you go, and a steady stream of Ramen?

I've been fortunate enough to move to a state where owning a home is actually economically feasible. If I still lived in CA there is no way I could have ever owned a home in a neighborhood that wasn't located in the 909 and wasn't a shoebox. I'd have opted for a nice apartment and reconciling with the fact that home ownership was for those who lived in states that had less than desirable ocean access. So, here I am in a state with less than desirable ocean access and affordable housing and I have gone ahead and decided to start the process of buying a home. Shoot me now.

This has to be one of the most insane things I have ever done. Not only do I have loan people (used car salesmen) combing through my financial history, I also have to prepare myself for the serious money gouging exercises you have to go through even before you plop down the down payment and acquire all the crap that goes along with owning a house. Did you know that you have to pay an inspector, loan insurance, home owners insurance, home owners warranty, title people, title insurance, and other various crapola? It's hard to keep everything straight when you're in the thick of things. I can't even imagine those people that buy houses to flip them. They do this all the time!

Oh, and the waiting. The waiting KILLS. It's like going on a date and waiting for the guy to call you. You submit an offer and you wait. You wait to see if the seller likes you and wants to do business with you. Even though we are in a super craptacular economy, the human directive to negotiate the best deal is still strong. 

It's hard to keep my sanity just as hard as it is to keep all these fees and requirements straight. Do any of you have any good tips for first time home buyers? Maybe some online tools to help one keep track of all this junk?