Merry Chrismahunukwanzika!

Didn't want to leave anyone out there. So, how was your INSERT HOLIDAY HERE? Mine was pretty nice. Stayed home for the first time and didn't head to see the family in the Pacific Northwest. I wasn't cold, I wasn't in an airport with crying babies or sick people, and I got to sleep as much as I wanted. Not bad. Of course I did miss some family togetherness moments but I think we can make that up next time we see each other.

Now to pack away the decorations and dispose of the tree. I'm having a hard time reconciling the fact that I'm going to have to haul this green behemoth out to the curb so that the trash man can take it away. I just don't want to do it. I want a magical elf to show up at my house, blink the tree out of existence, and even clean all the pine needles embedded into the carpet. That would truly be a Christmas miracle.

I have no idea where I was going with this post so I'll just quit while I'm a head. Happy New Year!

Screwing Around....

....with the layout. I wish I could be laziest luckiest person alive and find a Blogger template that actually has awesome sharkness on it but alas, I am not lucky just lazy. So, sorry if everytime you come back here it looks different. I guess this means I'm apologizing to approximately 2 people on the internet. You know who you are and I love you for visiting :).

Hangovers

All the advances in medical science and there is still no cure for the hangover! Sure, I could drink water while I'm drinking alcohol, but c'mon! Where's the fun in that?

Wine is a helluva hangover. I liken it to death on a stick. Fortunately I had the foresight to take some Tylenol before bed so I woke up in fair shape. Even feel like a nice dog walk would be a good idea. The poor boyfriend on the other hand is throwing me eye daggers because he can hear me softly typing on my iPhone.

If anyone still reads this tiny piece of inane web space, what's your cure for a hangover? Hair of the dog? IV? Praying for the sweet release of death?

Oh, and Happy Holidays.

Sunday, Lazy Sunday

I'm the type of girl that likes to be productive on the weekends since I cant take care of normal living stuff during the week. The problem is that I always have an obstacle: Lazy Sundays. Sometimes I am successful in getting around them but today was not one of those days. Slept in til 11. Attempted to get up. Now it's 1:22 and I'm still in the warm embrace of my bed. Wtf?

How can I beat my addiction to Lazy Sundays? I don't think I can. Oh well, might as well succumb to the delightful coziness of my duvet. Zzzzzzzz

I Don't Want To Get Out Of Bed

That pretty sums up my morning. It's 32 degrees and while I know that there is a fat chance in hell that it will snow here in Phoenix, I'd still like a damned snow day so I don't have to get out of bed and go to work. Yes, I'm still in bed. Don't judge me.

So, how do you motivate yourself to get out of bed on a chilly morning like this? I'm all fresh out of ideas.

Robbie

This is Robbie. He is a badass. That is all.

The Bike, The Bus, and The Bike Again

This is Tang. Tang is my awesome Electra 7D Townie that I have owned now for about 3 ish years. I first bought tang when I lived in LA with the full intention of riding everywhere on the Westside since everything was "soooo close" to me. My whole dream of biking to a friend's place in West Hollywood didn't exactly pan out, but I did have some really enjoyable rides down the PCH trails along the beach. I even convinced some friends that this was the thing to do on a Sunday brunch/sangria run. But Brentwood was kinda hilly and my ass was kinda lazy so Tang got a work out twice to three times a month. 

Moving to AZ, Tang found a purpose once again. For those of you who don't know since AZ is not exactly the premier vacation destination spot, this place is freaking flat like your sister's chest. no hills. there may be a slight man-made hill that was created to accommodate an overpass walkway, but really don't expect to find any sort of incline here unless you go mountain biking. Flat is PERFECT for my 'sure i wanna get in shape but not actually ride up a hill so effing steep I give up half way through' sort of leisurely workout. Tang has been taken out tons of times on Thai food runs, library book returns, and the occasional beer tour. What better way to get home after a metric ass ton of beer than on a bike through a safe greenbelt between houses. I can really only hurt myself and possibly a raccoon. But even though AZ is fantastical for lazy bikers, the heat pretty much kills any good bike riding during the summer.

Ok, so now that you know my history of bike usage (mostly for fun, screw off activities), I now bring you to today. Today..... which also happens to be the first day it's rained in MONTHS. 

I have a Civic that's going to be turned in soon and I wanted to get a few scratches repaired before inspection so that 1. the Dealership cant take me to the cleaners and 2. I can get it done on the cheap and fairly quickly. So, I took the car to MAACO. Not a bad shop. Pretty fast and friendly. Dropped the car off there on Saturday not realizing that my laptop was still in the trunk. The laptop I use FOR WORK. The laptop where I do that whole thing where I make money. Dumbass. Because of this, I had to formulate a fairly brilliant plan Sunday night to get my laptop and somehow make it to work all without a car. Now, keep in mind that when I say I had to formulate a fairly brilliant plan, I mean that my boyfriend had to formulate a fairly brilliant plan since I was too busy calling myself a dumbass. The plan devised was simply this: get to MAACO by 715, help Aly put her bike together (front wheel), knock on the door and hope these suckers get in before their designated time of 730a, grab laptop, bike it over to the bus stop half a mile away in time to catch the 739ish bus, take it all the way to Elliot and then bike to work. Simple, right?

Everything went according to plan in the beginning: MAACO guy was actually there early and let me in to get the laptop. I managed to make it to the bus stop about 4 min ahead of the 81. Everything is looking SMOOTH. Well, that was until the bus actually came and for the first time in my life, I had to put my bike on the bus rack. The bus rack. Having never done this before, I simply didn't know where to start. Is my front wheel facing the right way? Can I move this jagwagon's pedals so I can slide my bike in? Why isn't the hook for the front wheel pulling out far enough? OH MY GOD I MUST LOOK LIKE A TOTAL ASSHOLE. 

Yeah, I looked like a total asshole. Luckily, the fabulous bus driver realized that I completely screwed and he hopped out of the bus to help me. Actually, first he prefaced it with "Hey, I'm never supposed to leave my seat and get out of the bus but you look so miserable." and then a "You know I'm not supposed to touch personal property" as he was helping me secure my bike. I don't think I thanked this guy nearly enough for what he did for me this morning. He was amazing. He saved me from my very confused, very frustrated self and redeemed me so that I only looked like half an asshole. 

I managed to get off at the right stop and actually unhook the bike in record speed all the while smiling as the bus driver gave me a big thumbs up. Of course it started to rain fatty drops on my mile ride to work but that didn't really matter... some really nice bus driver made it not suck so much.

To Go or Not To Go

there I was, blissfully wandering about the internets in search of the latest and greatest weirdest/disgusting/somewhat interesting maybe educational new bit of information when my Gmail notifier went off: You Have a Facebook Message. do i really now? I rarely get FB messages. usually they are from random people that think they know me or @troymccluresf/@savagecats/@valleyadjacent telling me about something awesomely beer related.

I open Facebook and what do I see? apparently it's been 10 years since I graduated high school and now someone is organizing a reunion this year. what... the... hell. first of all it's been 10 years? i'm that old? holy jeebus. just yesterday I remember partying all night, throwing up on sidewalks, and walking up by 11 for good old Sunday brunch just like those youngins do. now I stay in Friday/Saturday nights, watch movies with the boyfriend and the dogs, wake up by 8 because I actually want to be productive the next day. ok, I'll give them that. I'm old.

But let's move on to my second thought, shall we? high school. why the hell would I want to be trapped in a room, eating crappy food with people I generally didn't care for? no, my high school years weren't the hell you see depicted on Lifetime after school specials, but it sure as hell wasn't so peachy either. I maybe liked..... 4 people in high school enough to converse with them on a regular basis. even then I ended up mostly sticking with myself towards to the end of my senior year. just know this: COLLEGE > HIGH SCHOOL. by far.

and now for my last thought.... isn't this what Facebook is for? hasn't Facebook made high school reunions obsolete? Facebook has allowed me to stay in regular touch with the handful of people I care to talk to. it has also let me silently stalk those that I wish will get fat/ugly/unemployed. it's basically provided me instant access to all the same things I would learn at a high school reunion.

so, do I go? probably not. I have no desire to trek back to the Los Angeles area and be forced to smile at/make small talk with/fake being pleasant with a bunch of people that really didn't know or care about me and that I was perfectly happy not interacting with back then. who would go to their 10 yr reunion? I might hit up the 25 though. I mean, c'mon, A LOT OF POUNDS can be put on by then and male pattern baldness really shines through.

Yeah, I know. I haven't really been around....

....but I have a good excuse? well, I really don't. you see, the thing is I'm lazy. look at my typing. I'm capitalizing "I" but really not giving a shit about the beginning of the sentence. but I'm back. I know you're excited. you don't have to comment all at once. take your time.

I've been busy with a couple of things: trip to India (see, I capitalized that), buying a house, and working my ass off. that's enough to keep a girl too wrapped up to post on her dumb blog that no one reads anyway. yet, here I am on a Monday night spending way too much time on CSS and widgets and posting. I don't know what possessed me. maybe I just needed a distraction from work or maybe I just needed a place where I could vent about whatever the hell I wanted to. little from column A and a little from column B.

I guess this is the part where I tell you that I'll be picking this up again. if you'll be kind enough to bear with me, I'll attempt to entertain you with stories of my botched home improvement jobs and exercise/diet.

well, it's nice to be back.